What I Did On My Summer Vacation…
1) I followed my own motto’ Reclaim Yourself! Love Yourself! Live Yourself! I took the whole month of August off for R&R for the first time in 5 years!” After returning home to Ottawa from a four-year adventure living and working overseas, I restarted my private practice in counselling November 2017. The first few years were, as expected, inordinately busy restarting a business from scratch. By March 2020, the pandemic meant in person office service had to be shut down. I settled into my home office to work online, all hours, days and evenings, accommodating a full client load from well beyond the confines of Ottawa. I fully enjoyed the new regime and two more years sped by, seemingly in the blink of an eye. Khalil Gibran writes “work is love made visible” and it sure felt like that to me!
Time away from work now seemed a drastic decision to make, which I made only in July after much equivocation through the spring and despite my daughter’s gentle encouragement of the idea since January. I love my work; I love the people I work with, and I didn’t want to stop. But as my clients let me know about their summer vacations, travel plans and wanting to take time off from therapy sessions for a few weeks to a month, I felt encouraged to do the same.
I must admit it was a wonderful idea. A dedicated time of rest, reflection and rejuvenation felt to be an exceptionally good thing. I had not been away on a spiritual retreat for many years and my inner voice had been suggesting the idea quite regularly since last fall! I finally succumbed and decided to cocoon myself for a week at the Loretto Mary Holme Spiritual Centre on Lake Simcoe. I claimed the only remaining fourteenth spot at a silent retreat being offered the first week of August as part of an Introduction to Life writing course.
The retreat ended on my birthday Sunday August 7th. The soul can be very direct in its guidance if we are willing to follow!
I arrived a day early and was therefore assigned the only hundred-year-old log cabin perched on the cliff edge of the property, overlooking the water. It was built by a local Indigenous man and his son, complete with a large medicine wheel created on the lawn outside it. The other participants would occupy rooms in the main building some distance away, the next day when the retreat officially started. So, I was literally going to be alone overnight on the sprawling property. As this unexpected reality dawned on me, I felt the pangs of anxiety, even fear, at finding myself so seemingly vulnerable.
As I unpacked and settled into the cozy lodging, ate the dinner I had brought with me, read a little and eventually sat on the covered screen in a porch overlooking the water to enjoy the vivid summer sunset, the velvety dark cocoon of night settled lovingly around me. I was comforted and relaxed.
The truth of my situation gently came into my awareness.
I was not alone. I am not alone. I am never alone. The Infinite Source of all that is, also dwells within me. Relaxing in the arms of the Beloved, I fell into one of the deepest and most peaceful sleeps I have had in a long time. I slept deeply for ten hours with the one or two inevitable bathroom breaks during the night. In the morning, I took a luxurious hour or more to wake up from the state of reverie slowly fully before getting out of bed to make my morning cup of tea.
Even before the official start of the retreat, I received an essential gift I had not even imagined.
In releasing any expectations, agendas and relaxing into the moment, I had come home to myself more deeply. Spontaneously acquiescing to my soul’s guidance, I received exactly what I needed even before the planned program started. The grace of the Beloved is truly infinite.
2) After three years of multiple iterations, various platforms, companies, and individuals had at it, my talented assistant built me the website I had been imagining. This final iteration, for the for seeable future, expresses me, my philosophy and unique approach to my work most authentically. It makes sense that it took my wise and wonderful daughter, who knows me better than anyone, to get the job done!
Thank you, Yaseena Muryum McKendry, for the huge blessing you are in my life.
Thank you to the One who delivered you, through me, to the world.
